Who or what is to blame? People and things DO happen to us. We are victims. As Tom Ziglar states in this show, feeling blame is often justified and makes all the sense in the world. We’ve often got every right to feel that way! But do we use the blame as an excuse to confine us? Or do we do the illogical thing and…let it go? And succeed…anyway?! Thanks to NerdWallet and ZipRecruiter for supporting this episode.
This is episode 425 of The Ziglar Show, and today we have Zig expounding on the message we shared in the previous show, #424. He continues on about how with anger and unforgiveness we are hurting ourselves, voluntarily handicapping our own success. In this segment he leads off talking about blame. Now, folks, before you think you are above this, I challenge you to listen to him for a mere two minutes. But I encourage you to listen on to the end of his talk and hear Tom Ziglar and I discuss the reality that very, very few of us escape the claws of blame in our life. Getting free of it may be THE very ticket we need to get out of the jail of our life. Let’s do it!
Hi, everyone, this is Kevin Miller, host of the Ziglar Show, where we are here for one reason…to inspire your true performance. We all want to have and achieve certain things. What we have will be dependent upon what we do. Our society voraciously consumes info on what and how to do things, so we can have. But to really do the right things, Zig tells us…we have to first…BE the right person. That’s what we discuss in today’s show and all shows…how to BE…better, different. So we can DO the right things to HAVE what we desire.
If today’s show sparks some ideas, thoughts, concerns or questions in you, let Tom Ziglar and I know and we’ll discuss them in an upcoming show! Send your questions or comments to firstname.lastname@example.org.
OK, folks, here, then, is…Zig, then Tom Ziglar and I will be with you to discuss these issues further!
So Zig leads off saying,
When you blame someone all your life for your problems, then forgive them, you can no longer blame them. That means you’re now accepting responsibility for your future. Your life.
Let’s dissect that a bit, because that sounds harsh. The definition of “blame” is – assign responsibility for a fault or wrong.
There are times when we are victimized by others in many ways. If a coworker has an infraction at work and blames me, and I lose my job, that person IS to blame for me losing my job. Even if I forgive them, it’s just true.
But what we are talking about here is using that reality as an excuse as to why I can’t overcome and triumph.Isn’t that what we are really talking about, Tom…excuses?
>>Hear Tom’s comments on the show
OK, I want to take this further into…blaming circumstances. Sometimes it’s not a person who is to blame. A large boulder could, for no reason, fall on my car. It is to blame! But…will it overcome me and I’ll use it as an excuse to be minimized? Zig had every reason for blame and excuses. He was one of 12 kids, his dad died and mom was amazing. So he couldn’t necessarily blame a person, but he could blame the circumstances.
So what does it really look like to live a blame-free life? There are things we fall victim to!
>>Listen to the show
Imagine if every time you love someone you are given an extra portion of energy…of life. Every time you let anger control your life…unforgiveness, bitterness, a double portion of that energy is burned. You’re actually shortening your life.
Tom, I covered this in the last show from another message from Zig. When we are giving our energy to anger and unforgiveness, we are hurting ourselves and all those around us. How do you reconcile that with things that DO happen and anger, sometimes righteous anger, is relevant?
We’re not robots, and I know that’s not Zig’s point, but this is hard stuff!
>>Hear Tom’s comments on the program
The strong and the wise need to admit they have weaknesses. That’s a healthy self-image. We need help.
To me, Tom, that’s two different things. Anyone in their right mind would admit they have weaknesses. But…getting help is another matter. We like self-help and personal development resources, which is why books, audios, podcasts like this, blogs and more are devoured in massive quantities.
But to actually get help from a coach, consultant, trainer, counselor…as a culture…that is still few and far between. However, I’ve rarely EVER talked with a successful leader who has not had some significant guidance from another. How have you seen this played out?
>>Hear Tom’s responses on the show
Tom needed to lose about 40 pounds. Joined a health club and hired a trainer. How many of us know what to do but don’t do it?
They had a problem, they said, “I can’t solve it, I need help.” A healthy self-image will help you do that.
– Why don’t we?
Getting positive testimony and encouragement. The phone call that sang your praises.
You weren’t better equipped; you didn’t learn something new. All it did was inspire you to be at your full potential. How can you do that without hoping for a phone call? Nobody can make you or force you to be better. Nobody has power to do that. Only you do. So do you rely on others…give them the power to get you to your best at any moment? Or…can you harness that power yourself?
Who dictates your self-image?
Inspire YOUR…true performance!