“What are your primary tactics for changing your attitude when you get down, negative, angry, sad, fearful, etc.?”
-Doing things to change perspective, outwardly and internally.
-Our voice is powerful. We listen to ourselves, speak truth and positivity to yourself, even if you don’t believe it in the moment.
- Never speak anything that you don’t wish to be true
- Speak to yourself as if you were talking to someone else.
-GRATITUDE, even for the simplest things
-Acknowledge that you have the power to change your mindset, and ultimately, those things that you can’t control, give that to God.
-Look at situations with faith for the future.
[00:02] Welcome to The Ziglar Show, where we inspire your true performance. I’m your host Kevin Miller and today we are talking about managing, controlling and changing your attitude, one of Zig Ziglar’s favourite and foundational topics! We play a 3.5 minutes clip from Zig Ziglar on changing your attitude, and from it I asked on my agentkmiller Facebook, page, “What are your primary tactics for changing your attitude when you get down, negative, angry, sad, fearful, etc”. We’ve gotten nearly 50 comments in less than 24 hours. Michelle Prince and I talk through the responses, you will enjoy and get much from this dialogue. So let’s dive in quick with a 3.5 minutes story from Zig on attitude.
[04:26] Now we’ll go over the responses from Facebook to this question we derived from Zig’s message: “What are your primary tactics for changing your attitude when you get down, negative, angry, sad, fearful, etc.”
[04:55] Now…let’s dive into the show!
[05:13] Tony Elam: I try to identify what the problem is and then create an alternative. I say “Which is better this or this?” Also I might do something to change my focus. I have realized I don’t have all the answers and though that’s obvious, I remind myself that I don’t need all the answers before taking action on an unknown.
[05:40] Of course that’s how we should look at all situations right look at both sides of the coin but easier said than done sometimes. But it is a good approach.
[06:03] Gregory Byerline: Run in the woods, look across the room at my amazing family, listen to inspiring music, stop, build a fire. And sometimes bourbon for this purpose.
[06:34] Dave Breitinger: Speaking out loud against the negative attitude or thought. It may sound a little crazy to others but it seriously works.
[06:57] There’s just something powerful we are our voice, we listen to our voice and when you speak something out loud, when you speak truth, when you speak what you want to be not necessarily where you are, you’re planting seeds, you’re putting it out there and things are more likely to come to fruition you know when we’re putting out the positive things. What usually happens though is we tend to speak or think the things that we don’t want to happen you know, things that you know may take us down the wrong path. So it’s important to just first of all identify what you want and speak the truth even if you don’t believe it yet as it would say tell the truth in advance.
[09:16] Dana Marie: Focusing on gratitude.
[10:16] There’s two ways to look at that there is you know the Pollyanna approach that you’re just kind of avoiding the truth and things might be horrible and if you’re just focusing on the positives and some may look at that as you know, they can actually make it kind of think I don’t look at it as you know when we’re grateful, it’s an attitude right. So it’s a very difficult to be negative and grateful at the same time. And so when you’re focused on and no matter what’s going on in your life, I learned this when I was very young and I’ve continued to hear it and read about it throughout my mind, my journey, my story, especially is no matter what is going on around you can find something to be grateful for or and it will literally take you out of the funk you know what they’re going on. There’s a story that Zig told and I think it was and how to stay motivated.
[13:49] Thom Seehafer: Exercise has always worked for me – oxygen to the brain and thru the body – process, deal with it and purge from body – release.
[14:56] Like he said about the oxygen you know that we’re getting when you get more oxygen to your brain you know that helps our bodies and it helps us to function at the optimal level. And you know you don’t even have to necessarily exercise to get some of those benefits, you can do that breathing and meditation and yoga and all about the just getting more oxygen. Sometimes I will literally just you know start breathing like you know deep breaths just to kind of get my focus back for me, it’s about that helps me to focus, when I have deep breathing.
[15:51] Scott Priestley: Acknowledge that you have control, then any of the above – but the first step is identifying that I am empowered to change how I feel – right now, in this moment!
[17:08] We absolutely do have the control and like you said who wants to admit that we’re in control of the bad things that happen to us or the bad scenarios or relationships, but we do. Everything in life is a choice, we choose you know I do a lot of talking and speaking on productivity and time management and you know it’s one of those funny things or write jokes about like how little time they have but the reality is we all have twenty-four hours in a day. So we are choosing what we do with our twenty-four hours and so alternately if we don’t get things done, it’s not because we didn’t really ran out of time, it’s truly that we just chose not to make it a part of our day. But that’s a hard pill to swallow sometimes and you know of course we want to blame it on something else and I think there’s something I want to add to the control. I do believe we do have that control like we’re talking about but I also believe that and again this is kind of bring in my own spiritual component into this is you know to some degree we can try our best and do our best and try to control everything is much as we can, but ultimately you know God has a bigger plan in some cases.
[20:36] Dan Miller: I carry a medallion in my pocket with the inscription “Amor Fati” which means my attitude is always a choice. Even if it appears that something negative happens, I can ask instead, “What does this make possible?”
[22:50] I believe it is a part of the grander plan, bigger and better waiting for you. There was a meme that was on Facebook a while back that I saw and it was a picture of Jesus holding a teddy bear or a little girl holding a teddy bear and she’s holding on to it for dear life and then there’s Jesus you know give me the bear, give me the bear and she was like no no no I can’t, and behind his back he’s holding this giant teddy bear. All she has to do is just release it and have faith and give it to him and she will then get this other bigger better you know teddy bear and I love that and I thought it was a great visual of life right. You know we think we’re holding on to all that we know and that that feels comfortable and we’re not willing to have the faith to step out or or to release things and but yet there could be something so much better if we just let go of fear and and the doubt that there is something better it is all about faith at the end of the day.
[27:27] Joe Lalonde: For me, it depends on the reason I’m down. Sometimes it’s because I haven’t been physically active enough. That’s when I go for a run. Sometimes it’s because I feel like I’m failing. That’s when I review my file of wins. I try to have a cache of ways to combat those feelings based on the reasoning behind them.
[28:27] I like that he said about the wins, talking to you now keeping track of your wins, that’s something that I’ve done most of my life for I’ve given journals to people and I call it a success journal where instead of writing down everything that happened for the day go back and write down all of your successes over the last month, year, five years. Even as in the little things the things that when you go back when you’re having one of those days where you’re so discouraged and you know you just it wasn’t so bad about yourself, you can go back and read and say you know what I am doing OK or I do have a lot to be again going back to what we talking about that gratitude of reviewing your wins is really just kind of that grateful feeling of pride.
[30:18] Chris Wallace: Stop, breathe, put the situation into perspective, focus on solution. Be grateful. I also refrain from talking about it with others. It can get you even more riled up if the situation has something to do with others, don’t feed that monster!
[31:29] I think it’s personality and you know not to stereotype men and women but women tend to be more the communicators and men tend to be more, they keep more internal not to say that that’s across the board but generally. You know I have to agree though with what they said about because if you think about a situation, let’s just say maybe you’re upset about something or maybe somebody did something wrong to you and there’s two ways we can handle it. We can you know go to ourselves, go to God and just try to process it without creating drama right then and in a sense I mean by going to God about it then you really shouldn’t go to anyone else because in a sense you’re kind of, you’re saying that well I’m not really going to take what I heard from you, I’m going to go see what somebody else has to say about it. It really does I I feel like there are times when I’ve done that and I feel worse you know because then it does stir up that drama now if it’s just communicating like your wife needs you want to catch us a little bit different than if there’s a problem and you need to especially if it involves someone else to go talk to a third party about it, really just creates drama and tension.
[35:26] Alan ONeill: Ask myself, what is the worst possible outcome, accept that most of the time the outcome will be better than that. Analyze why the situation occurred, learn from it and MOVE ON!
[36:17] There that’s actually a coaching techniques that’s been used where you know let’s say somebody has a fear of. I don’t know changing jobs or writing a book or a fear of something and to ask them OK well what’s the worst thing that could happen if you did this, well I could lose my job. Well OK what’s the worst thing that will happen if you lose your job well and I won’t be able to pay my bills, now what’s the worst thing that could happen if you’re not able to pay your bills well then I’d have to move , what’s the worst thing that happens if you have to move well that’s another like and you just keep going and going and going and going to get to the absolute last possible worst thing that possibly out and and then you realize it’s not this big ugly monster as much as you make it out in your mind.
[36:58] Jeffrey Miller: Realize that I can Change my Thoughts and Attitude any time I want. No one else is in control of them! And a visit to the mirror to confirm that I can smile and laugh at myself no matter what! And let’s not forget to say “I Love You” to that self in the mirror too! 🙂
[37:43] Donna Roberts: Re-direct to my gratitude journal as well as sometimes speak to it out loud in a positive way. I also try to remember to give myself grace and forgiveness.
[38:13] We beat ourselves up and think like oh you know gosh how could you do that how stupid can you be but yet if it was your neighbor doing the same exact thing or a colleague you’d probably encourage them and say oh don’t worry about it you know what that’s just you’ll get that happens to a lot of people move on, but when we do it we just beat ourselves up.
[38:54] Michael Norton: WWZD – What Would Zig Do … Piling on though what Chris Wallace said, put things into perspective. Like the old saying, “I once complained that I had no shoes, until I met the man with no feet.” – Perspective is everything.
[39:26] We joke about that in my house, there is something terrible happens or you know that we think is the end of the world like now that the first problem. Well I just wanna say and I think you know here time that perspective and shift in thinking and all that I mean just go to another part of the world, you realize how much you have to be grateful for you know if you woke up this morning and your hearing the sound of this podcast and you’re breathing you know airing your lungs that’s enough to be grateful because there are many people who don’t have you know half of what we have.
[40:22] Dan Brandenburg: I love sport bikes and nothing drains negativity and bad vibes like hitting curvy back roads at triple digit speeds. The focus, force, and acceleration you can achieve on desolate country back roads can compress years of psychotherapy into a couple of gallons of super unleaded.
[40:43] Jason Smith: I get in the truck and drive. Find some old back road, often gravel and go.sometimes the music is loud, sometimes its just me thinking. Sometimes its prayerful, sometimes it might be considered irreverent. When I was in Eastern Oregon, I’d often end up at a cabin in the forests. The only place I consider home. I’d also end up on various rancher’s property, going through the desert farmlands. But I was almost always driving. Splitting wood was my preferred way as a teen. Profitable, good exercise, and destructive enough to get out any bad feelings.
[42:48] Did this confirm some of your own tactics for changing your attitude, or inspire you to engage with some of the strategies? If so, and you got value, tell us on iTunes by leaving a review. Thanks so much to all of you who do! Coming up next in show 525 we bring you a really interesting guest. Lee Cockerell was Executive Vice President of Disney. Yes, the entire magical kingdom. Lee barely made it out of high school, no college degree, a hard upbringing with a mom who married and divorced five times. He was adopted twice. The only solid figure in his life was his grandmother who he was taken away from as a child. Lee is 72 and a few years ago his wife almost died. He suffered severe anxiety and depression and through much counseling was brought to the issue of abandonment. From his grandmother as a kid to his wife in his late 60s. It’s a very candid and powerful conversation. This guy was in charge of 40,000 employees at Disney and his message of caring for people is profound. Till then folks, thank you for letting me walk with you as we inspire our true performance…together!